Crystal Singer is a great book when you’re fifteen and/or know nothing about music. (Why a writer who supposedly does have voice training would hold something like perfect pitch in such high universal regard is mystery to me, for instance. Also, it’s kind of weird that there’s apparently no “popular” genres a of music in The Future--just classical. Instead of recommending non-classical music careers, the maestro immediately jumps to things like “crystal tuning.”) It doesn’t really stand the test of time in a lot of ways, but it does manage to be entertaining...if you like the main character, which I don’t all that much. Much like the irritating burr in her voice, I find her to be a bit annoying.

In which there are Divas.

KILLASHANDRA: I worked my ass off and now you tell me I’VE NO VOICE?!

PROFESSOR: No, no, you definitely have a voice (in fact, you’ve almost burst my ear drums just now), you just aren’t suited for leading roles because of that annoying burr in your voice in the upper register!

KILLASHANDRA: WHAT DO YOU MEAN, AN ANNOYING BURR YOU ROTTEN SO AND SO?!

FX: *burrrrrrrrrrrrrr*

PROFESSOR: Now see, that’s exactly what I mean.

She's so vain, this Outline is about her